10/1 Raw Slater Promo on Edge,Taker,and RVD

I’M JUST ONE MAAAAAAANNNNNNN! WOOOOOAAAAAHHHH WELL I’M A ONE MAN BAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNND!


[A surprisingly happy looking Heath Slater appears from the curtain. He walks down the ramp pointing at fans and yelling at them while stopping at the end of the ramp and power stums his signature $40,000 air guitar ending with a loud “WOOOO YEEEEAAAH!” He enters the ring and grabs the microphone from Justin Roberts’ hand.



People, you are in for a treat tonight! Apparently, Vince McMahon loves the sound of Southern Rock because he has put me, Heath Slater, THE ONE MAN BANNNND BABAY, in a fatal four-way with three main eventers. [Slater raises his hand in front of his face and counts 3 with his fingers]



One of these losers is Edge. [The crowd cheers loudly at the mere mention of his name] OH SHUT UP! Why didn’t you people cheer like that for me?! He can’t even sing! Anyway, this “Rated F Superstar” may have beaten me two weeks ago, but tonight is different alright people? I don’t “fear the spear” alright? He should fear the Sweetness because that’s what I’m going to give him tonight. I bet he’s never even heard of Southern Rock in Canadia Land or wherever he’s from!

The second person in this match is Rob Van Dam.[The crowd cheers loudly followed with RVD! chants] “Mr. Monday Night”? What a joke! That victory he had on Smackdown was a fluke alright people? I’m sure he cheated somehow. Have you people seen that outfit he wears?! What a dork. While I am rocking out in front of thousands of people and getting all of the ladies, he’s reading stupid comic books. I’m not afraid of all of the flippy doos he does. He will be knocked out after one E-Minor from the One Man Band!
[Slater smoothes his hair back with his hand]

The last person in this match is The WCW champion The Undertaker. [The crowd lets out a deafening cheer at the sound of the Deadman’s name] Ya know, I feel bad for The Undertaker. Up until tonight, he hasn’t had to deal with any main event level talent. Now he gets to fight me. Heath Slater. And I know for a fact that he is scared alright? I’m actually going to do him a favor! When I hit him with maybe four or five Sweetnesses he will be sent back into his grave where he belongs with only the sweet sound of Southern Rock to listen to for the rest of eternity. Sounds like heaven to me babay WOOO! [Slater gives a nice strum on his air guitar]

I guarantee I will win tonight people. I’m finally being treated like the main event talent that I am. After I win tonight I know I will get a title shot at Halloween Havoc. They’re already getting my contract ready. Trust me people, the One Man Band’s tour is only getting started and you all will be able to see the encore tonight! WOOO!

[Slater begins to strum his air guitar in the middle of the ring as his theme begins to play]

[THIS PROMO IS NOW CLOSED AND OPEN FOR GRADING.]

.....
OOC: Awesome job as usual , Critic.


Jay

Badass Game wrote:

.....
OOC: Awesome job as usual , Critic.


Jay

Thanks Jay that means a lot coming from you.

(I used 5sp to interrupt this promo)

(Before Heath can leave the ring, his music is cut off by a familiar sound...)






(The WcW Universe explodes in excitement for the Rated R Superstar as they can't stand to listen to Heath Slater anymore)

Edge: Do you honestly think that you can come out here and scold me like this behind my back?

(The WcW Universe explodes in agreement to Edge)

Edge: No, that's not how it works. You can come out here and run your mouth all you want but one thing will always stay the same, and that is that you indeed, Fear the Spear.

(The WcW Universe bellows out an uproar of excitement)

Edge: If you recall, last week on Raw, I not only speared you once, but I speared you twice, only for the reason to make you Fear the Spear! This is a message for anything else in the back to not ever talk behind my back or I will make you, what I did to the little ketchup-headed moron, and that is make you Fear the Spear!

[After listening to the taunts from Edge, Slater looks furious]

KETCHUP HEADED?! WHO ARE YOU CALLING KETCHUP HEADED?! I AM HEATH SLATER ALRIGHT?! THE ONE MAN BAND! THE LADIES LOVE MY HAIR ALRIGHT? THEY THINK IT’S SEXY!

[Slater flips his hair around with his head. He takes a deep breath and composes himself. He sneers as he looks back at the Rated R Superstar.]

I don’t care about you Edge, I only care about me. So you beat Dude Love on Smackdown. So. What? I beat him too without even using any weapons.

You think you’re soooooo cool with your spears and your stupid coat, well let me get it through your thick skull alright? You are not cool. I, am cool. I am the One Man Baaaaaaannnnd babay and there ain’t nobody that is going to even know your name after I beat you and the other two losers tonight. So why don’t you get your butt to the ring; [Slater turns to Justin Roberts] announcer man, go call out the other chumps because I got places to go alright?

[Slater hands his microphone to Justin Roberts and stand in the corner of the ring waiting for the match to begin.]

THIS PROMO IS NOW CLOSED AND OPEN FOR GRADING

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OFFICIAL GRADE


Slater - I was hard pressed to find something wrong in your promo. You don't indicate by name when Slater is speaking , but it isn't needed. There are 2 things I want to see from you......1. crowd interaction , 2. step outside your comfort zone - try a different promo style , just because you have the skills for it. BUT , this is a solid 5 sp promo. Enjoy it.


Edge - I almost feel bad doing this but , you put yourself in a losing battle. Promo wise- Critic is The Rock and today , you look like Gillberg. Sorry , man. Harsh reality. If we graded on a curve , you would be looking at 1 BUT , Thank God that we don't. On it's own merits , your promo has good formatting and color coding. Speaking sections are easily identified. Some of your grammar has issues. And , it is really time for some different gifs or none at all. All your promos are starting to look generic. 3 sp


Jay