Halloween Havoc and the US Title

I’M JUST ONE MAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNN! WWOOOOOAAAAAAHHHH WELL I’M A ONE MAN BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!



[Heath Slater appears from the curtain dressed in his street clothes. He is smiling to himself as he is walking down the ramp. He climbs up the steel steps and walks through the ropes. He waits for the boos to die down before he starts to speak. Unfortunately for Slater, the boos don’t stop so he begins talking anyway.]

Heath Slater: People, over the last few weeks you have seen Heath Slater, [He pauses, smiles, and yells] THE ONE MANNN BANNNNNND BABBAAAAYYYY! take the wCw by storm. I have defeated two people in a row. I stuffed a boot in Zack Ryder’s loud mouth and I took all the money out of Ted Dibiase’s bank alright? And only a few weeks before, I beat The Undertaker by making him tap out in a fatal four-way one on one match inside a Hell in a Cell Elimination Chamber!



Slater: Now people, you’re probably wondering “What’s next for Heath Slater?!” Well I’m here to tell you that I am on the quest for gold babay! Now I know that I deserve a shot at a title at Halloween Havoc on Sunday, so earlier today I went into Mr. McMahon’s office and demanded one. Take a look!

[Heath Slater points at the TitanTron. The camera zooms in on the Tron and we are taken to a clip from earlier today]

~Earlier Today~

[A confident looking Heath Slater walks up to Vince’s office and knocks on the door… and keeps knocking]

Vince McMahon: For Christ’s sake come in!

[Heath Slater walks into the room and sees Vince McMahon sitting at his desk. Vince looks at Slater and sighs at the sight of him, putting his hand to his forehead.]

Vince: What do you want?

Slater: Mr. McMahon my name is Heath Slater and I am the One Ma-

Vince: I know who you are now what the HELL do you want?!

Slater: Before I get to what I want sir I would like to start with a story. Long ago in Pineville, West Virginia there was a young healthy Southern boy who was destined to beco-

Vince: GET TO THE POINT GOD DAMNIT!!

Slater: The point is sir that I have won three matches now in wCw and I think I should be in the wCw title match against Randy Orton at Halloween Havoc.



[Vince just stares at Heath Slater for what seems like an eternity. The camera cuts to the outside hallway and we see Heath Slater running out of Vince’s office with Vince yelling after him]

Vince: GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE YOU IDIOT! I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL FIRE YOU IF YOU COME INTO MY OFFICE AGAIN!

[The screen fades, and we are back in the arena where Heath Slater is back on the microphone.]

Heath Slater: Well the meeting didn’t go as well as I’d planned but I think Vince and I have a mutual respect for each other now. It doesn’t look like I will be getting the match for the wCw title, but that doesn’t stop The One Man Band! There is other gold in this company just ripe for the taking. My GamGam, Petrune Slater, once said “Heath, if you want the other kids on the playground to stop making fun of your hair, you gotta step in and take control!” And my GamGam was never wrong. So tonight, right now, in this very ring, I am calling out the United States Champion, Rob Van Dam [The crowd cheers at the sound of his name] and demanding a title shot at Halloween Havoc! So get out here you little dweeb!

[Slater turns to the entrance ramp and waits for RVD to come out.]

{Open for RVD and Daniel Bryan to respond.}

I will wait to grade this promo. Even though I would really like to.

Edge you can go ahead and grade this one when you find the time.

{Official Grade}

Slater: Another great promo from you Critic. I love every promo you write. I love the inclusion of Vince in your promo too and you nailed it! 5SP